Unstitched!

I am officially unstitched! They removed the stitch where my drainage pipe was. I was given some large plasters but I hope I don't have to use them.

I finished my steroids which is one lot of tablets gone. I have also stopped my strong pain killers. I don't even need paracetamol that often. So just my usual Keppra (for my epilepsy) and paracetamol at night to help me sleep. This has muddled my sleep up a bit, I woke about 5.30am, stayed in bed for an hour but got up at 6.30. Sorted myself out with a nap later on.


Tomorrow I am going to contact the hospital as my eyesight has hit a brick wall. I am still relying on my left eye. Just going to see if I can see someone about my vision sooner rather than waiting a week till my next appointment and nothing changes in that time.

Popped Out

today has been very successful. It started with a pretty good sleep. since the operation my sleep has been horrible. i would wake up at 5 am most mornings where ever i was, hospital or by myself in my parents spare room. but today i was asleep till 7.30am in the morning and no headache. that gave the push to write my previous post.

I wanted to avoid sleeping so did a few things today, not too much though. Popped out with my wife for some lunch, went in to town. But by 3pm i was completely exhausted. I have g-had a quick sleep which sorted me out.

Today I got annoyed by Harwich Hospital, its been 24 hours and no one has told me if i have an appointment to have my last stitches out. the whole hospital is in a mess. i think it will me easier to go to Colchester walk in centre.

my sight is still relying on my left eye, nothing is re appearing ln my right. i tried blocking it and have  a small amount of sight but it gave me a bit of a headache so will leave that idea.

I have been recovering for a week.

This may be a bit scruffy as my sight is still pretty rubbish in my right eye so forgive me for the mistakes.


There is lots to write but i cannot focus for long, I will add in small parts each day. I was in surgery for about 7 hours, i was completely awake. the two worst parts with multiple stabbings in my wrists while there were trying to connect me to a machine  for my heart rate and blood pressure. I started to feel pain when they were skimmin down the lump, it got to a point where it took a couple of minutes to recover, we then stopped and finished up. samples were taken and it is being tested at the moment.

I was in hospital for 5 days. each day i was needing less sleep. i am on paracetamol and something a bit stronger at night to help me sleep. i managed to get through it with movies on my ipad and a dvd player, CSI is keeping me going.

I have been now staying with my parents for a few days and a and a few visitors round. I had my staples out of my skull, was easy. got another couple of staples after the bank holiday. ho[efully we will see a few more people. though i am still finding that i need a sleep in the afternoon.

My next appointment with my under two weels. I will find out more then, hopefully my sight in my right eye cines back, it gained more sight than went backwards so not sure what is going on. hopefully i will get pictures ne being cut open and operated on and awake so i am looking forward to them.

I am leaving it there today but going to rey and add to my blog each day. So lets see how it goes.

Its the big day!

Lying in bed...

I am awake, we are leaving in 40mins. I didn't sleep to bad. Got nearly 4 and half hours in. Though was rudely awoken by our cat knocking over a bin looking for a bit of gammon my wife had put in it! THANKS MELISSA!!

My mouth is dry! I need a drink! But it's nil by mouth. I didn't haven't loads last night but wasn't really thirsty and didn't want to be getting up during the night.

Think the nerves are finally kicking in a little. Can they just come and do it hear, right now. I am ready for them. Knife, chisel, hammer and a staple gun! I am already in bed, no need to move me, though I would not be prepared to stay awake during it! My dad has all the tools and mum has some reasonably sharp knives.

In the car...
Not much going on. So I guess this is my last post before I go in. So radio silence from me. I will finish with a picture if my long term companion, ladies and gentlemen I give you Roland!


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Its Happening

This morning I called my surgeons secretary, its going ahead, not sure exactly what time, but it is definetly happening tomorrow.

I woke up last night about 3.30am, the surgery had snuck into the dream and woke me up. It was officially the point which I really started to get nervous. I was in and out of sleep for the rest of the night, though felt surprisingly fresh when i had to get up for work. I was thinking about the last surgery i had three years ago, a rhinoplasty ( an operation on my nose as it was broken when young and a bit bent giving me restricted breathing.) I was not nervous for that during the build up, ok it is not major surgery but i was knocked out and had a couple of weeks off. But one i was being prepped it hit me and i became more nervous and just could not wait to be completely knocked out. So may be thats when i will get nervous, oh wait...I am awake through the whole procedure.

Last day at work to day for a while, handing over bits, I wont bore you. Get amazing card, created by Neil.


Been sent loads of messages on twitter and Facebook which I thank everyone for.

Bags are pretty much packed. Though had to text my wife as I forgot one very important item, Roland Rat. He
has come to all my hospital appointment's from one I was small and having gromits in my ears and when i had my rhinoplasty.

Also a quick note who has put a link to my blog on freedating.co.uk? I was looking at the stats for the blog and found that there is a link on there but i cannot access as I am not a member and do not wish to be.

I will write my last blog before i go into the hospital in the morning. The hospital has no internet signal on the wards. I will be blogging while I am in the hospital but I may just have to upload them all in one go when i am out if i am not allowed out of the bed, I will see what I can do though.

Again thank you for all the kind messages.

Packing my bags!

After the operation my wife, the cat and I are staying with my parents. Just so there will be a number of people to look after me. This means I am having to pack 2 bags, one for hospital and one to have at my parents.

The hospital bag is the usual bits with a Charlie Brooker book and 3d Magazines, iPod and iPad stocked with games, movies and music. Got my danger mouse pyjamas, yes I am that cool!

The other bag has clothes but also stuff to keep me entertained for the week. I am packing up my xbox, I have borrowed a number of games, battlefield 3, home front, Crysis 2 and another one. But this is not a computer game blog. I have brought first 6 series of CSI Las Vegas, I will take a few of those DVDs. Then just a few classics.

Had a phone call today from one of longest and closest friends, though he is not that close, Australia. He works in the outback 7 days straight then has time off so contact will be hard. Cheered me up speaking to him, may not be about a happy subject, but still made me smile.

Tomorrow I will find out if the surgery is definitely going ahead, so fingers crossed no emergencies come in!

Creating my playlist and working while looking like I want to fight!

I am writing this while I am waiting for my CDs to burn. I am allowed to listen to music during the surgery. Now it takes 4 - 5 hours so that potentially is between 4 and 7 CDs. I need to think very carefully about what I want, I don't want anything to heavy or jumpy, don't want to frighten the surgeon at a critical moment and don't want to put all mellow stuff on as I will get bored. I have decided to do more CDs than I need so I can decide during the surgery.

Also do I want podcasts? Maybe some Richard Herring or BBC fighting talk, they always go down well. Though you need to listen to them or sometimes you get lost. At least with music you can jump in and out when certain things are going on (I will be tested on various things to make sure I am ok at certain points.)

Few hours later...

So these are the CDs I have created:

Beatles
Daft Punk
Blondie
Deaumau5
Klaxons
Stereophonics
Queen
Blur
Incubus
Oasis
Foo Fighters
Electronic 80s
Funeral for a Friend
Air
Florence and The Machine

Also today I went back to work with my new hair cut! A lovely skin head (number 1 all over.) i have done it so i don't look a complete fool after my operation, my hair length will be at nearly even all over. I actually quite like it and so does my wife. Sadly it has shown me where I am losing hair but at least it's at the front and not on top like a monk. I had many comments at work, all saying I look a bit thuggish. I am not going to keep it like this but think it looks ok, I also like how I don't have to style it in the morning.

I start my steroids in the morning, dexamethasone, this is something to do with anaesthesia. Though I just took the prescription and said ok. Maybe I am a bit too laid back, but they would not give them to me for no reason. If you look at my body even though it is a woman's dream body I do not do steroids, it's all from surfing (on my iPad).

Tomorrow will be my last night at home for a while, going to enjoy my bed the next two nights.

Is it or isn't it?

Quick note something I forgot and I think if you will be wondering if u have read my first post, is it cancer? Well we don't know and won't know till 2 weeks after the operation. They will test what they remove. it is believed it is a low grade tumour. If it is growing, then it is incredibly slowly and you cannot tell by MRI, you need samples.

Awake Craniotomy Links

Now I have not been able to watch this all the way through but this is the procedure i will be going through, though one difference is that i will be awake through out the whole procedure, where as in america you are asleep while they open your skull.

Can understand if you do not want to watch this.

also a link to a rough guide to what i am having done in romford on the Southampton NHS site: http://www.suht.nhs.uk/OurServices/Nervoussystem/Neurosurgery/Diagnosisandtreatment/Braintumours/Awakecraniotomy.aspx

What's been going on over the past 3 months

This is going to be my blog / diary over the next six weeks. It is going to be a record of my recovery from brain surgery. But first I will go back to early April where all this started, or shall we say become more obvious and serious.

Mid April I woke up at about 2.30am on my bedroom floor naked with just my socks on (only socks because I was lazy). I woke up feeling hazy and could hear strange voices. I looked up and saw three random strangers standing over me all in green. They were paramedics, two from an ambulance and one from rapid response. I quickly grabbed the covers, they chuckled and said "don't worry we have seen it all before." I had no idea what was going on, felt ok, not brilliant but maybe as if I had been drinking, had a hazy head. I got changed myself and was then taken to the hospital and was in A&E for a few hours and sent home with no real answer to what happens, just that I had had a fit. I had never had a fit before so we were a little confused, my wife was obviously worried as seeing me like that was more frightening for her than me.

The next day I could barley move as I had pulled all the musles in my back. Our main worry was what caused it. We were going on holiday and we were worried about what would happen over there. We managed to get in and see a private doctor, we discussed my symptoms and he said it was an epileptic fit. This was confirmed after I also explained funny spells I had been having for a year, which I had put down to stress. These spells caused metallic taste in my mouth and would struggle to speak, I could feel them coming and would last a matter of seconds. He put me on a course of tablets called Keppra. These had an instant result, no more funny spells. So we went on holiday, I had to get new travel insurance which increased from £5 to £60! I had no problems on holiday and just tried to forget about it all and relax.

When I returned I went to a NHS neurologist at Colchester General, she was a bit strange and had a bit of an attitude problem, she didn't like the fact I went private and couldn't see how the private doctor came with that diagnosis and that I would have. CT scan and no MRI scan (private doctor had said I should have on). We thought we would see the out come of the CT and if nothing about an MRI came about we would ask for one, but had no issues. I had a CT scan, then a week later I was asked to have a MRI the following day and see the neurologist the following day. All this happened very quickly. Myself and family were wondering what is wrong especially as the neurologist had said I will not have one.

I returned to the neurologist and she informed me I had a lump deep on the left hand side of my brain about 2.5cm x 3cm. We asked all the questions, is it cancer, is it life threatening, does it need to be removed. She informed us it was cause liquid to be trapped brith it and that was causing the fits and it could have been there for at least 20 years (I'm 28). We were told as the medication was working it will probably be left there but I still need to see a neurosurgeon at Queens Hospital, Romford.

How wrong she was...

A few weeks later we went to Romford (45mins away) to see a neurosurgeon. We thought this was mandatory and he would tell us that I just need to have regular MRI scans to make sure it is not growing. straight away he informed us that they do not know what it is but that it has to come out. We were shocked, we explained what we had been told and he noticed how surprised we were. Te specialist would produce my MRI scans to a board of doctors and surgeons and they would discuss what the best thing to do was, though he did say were probably going to agree with him. So we left shocked and would return in two weeks.

Couple weeks later we went to see the neurosurgeon and he confirmed what he said before. They will be removing it, they will remove as much as they can, though maybe not all of it as it increases a risk of permanent damage to the brain.in the previous meeting he had also dropped another bomb shell and asked for me to think about having this operation completely awake. The operation is a craniotomy, they will use the MRI scan and a stealth MRI scan as I very special Sat Nav for my brain to locate it. I will be totally aware what is going on and will be asked questions and have tests to make sure I am ok during the 4-5 hour operation. In America they knock you out at the start and wake u back up once they have opened up your scull (the whole is about the size of a tennis ball). I was prepared to have this done and am currently thinking of what music I want to listen to as they allow you to play your own just to get through it. I was told the worst bits are the noise of your scull being opened up and the boredom.

Now I am chilled out with these things and still am now, I don't get worried to the day before. I have just had my hair cut to a number one so it's nice and short and still thinking of music I want to listen to.

Recovery, I have read up and as I am not bing knocked out I will be in hospital for 3 days max if all goes well, maybe put on the Saturday 20th August. I am going to be off work for a while, maybe 6 weeks. To keep me entertained I have been leant a bunch of computer games, signed up to love film and brought the first 6 series of CSI: Las Vegas ( original is best, no Miami or new York.) for the first week I have been told by my wife and mum I will be moving back in with my parents so they can look after me together, I haven't lived with my parents for three years and wasn't too happy as I am more comfortable at our flat. I made some demands, control of tv, sky movies and I decide what we eat (how many will come true, who knows?!?)

This was my long introduction, I may add to it but I didn't want to waffle but a lot has happened, I will now be adding a bit to this blog up to the date of e operation, Thursday 18th August 2011, 4 days away. Though this date may change as due to one neurosurgeon being away and one surgery being deep cleaned if an emergency comes in I may be put back 2 weeks, I will find out the day before which will be frustrating as that will be when I begin to worry.

So let this begin...

This will be my brain blog

Hi this is just a test! I will be blogging about my up and coming brain surgery and recovery.